HFriends
by Ninsg Veen
Summary: K/R yaoi. Friendship is important. Even more so in the lonely world I had secluded myself into. However, you can’t help it when your in love though. And I was in love, head over heels, with my best friend Kon Rei.


AN: Hi everyone! Somehow every time I write something I always get back to my first big yaoi fascination Hiwatari Kai and Kon Rei, they're so cute and begging to be abused *grin*.

Some of you might realize I read waaaay too much yaoi manga, which makes my brain distorted with pornographic images of men making out (among other things). If you're familiar with yaoi manga's, you must know about the absurd plots that some of them have sometimes. So please, forgive me if some of this seems a bit non-heterosexual, non-mushymushy/loveydovey or fluffy and all that. But hey! - love aint perfect, despite the fact that we fangirls want two men to be all cuddly and sweet, it's not always their nature. Hugs lead to kissing, kissing to sex, not a romantic day in the park watching the sun set.

Warning: GAY/SLASH/YAOI, don't like, or not interested- shoo, 'cause this story is not a good one to start your quest for 'something new'.

H-friends

----

When you've been friends for so long, or so strong, you gradually move into different comfort zones without noticing really.

I had fallen in love with him, probably at first sight. His fierceness was commendable, but his beauty, inside and out, was even more eye catching than that.

But friendships are important. Even more so in the lonely world I had secluded myself into. If I allowed love… I don't know, but it didn't seem a good idea back then.

You can't help when your in love though. And I was in love, head over heels, with Kon Rei.

---

I know exactly the time and date of my realization. I was sitting on the ground watching everyone practice their releases. I wasn't really paying attention to Max and Tyson. Instead I focused my thoughts on Rei. He was messing up that day, badly and made me help him. I grabbed his hands a bit harshly and told him to hold on to the trigger in a certain way. He looked at me and smiled, which made me feel hot in the face. I blamed the heat and I inhaled.

Did you know that your nose is an organ that is important in starting a romantic relationship? According to some studies, the smell of your other half is what makes or breaks the 'ice' so to speak. That's why in getting as boy or girlfriend it's better not to wear deodorant or perfume. Strange huh?

Well Rei wasn't wearing anything either, no deodorant, no shirt. When I inhaled I got a full load of his scent. It was hot outside and he had been training very hard. He smelled of sweat, a very manly smell, with traces of soil, probably from standing in the field barefoot all morning.

When I sat down to continue watching the troops, I noticed how a trickle of watery sweat made its way down Rei's chest. I noticed the muscles on his stomach flexing. Seriously, I watched in awe for a long time, until Kenny pointed out to me that "Rei really has a firm stance".

Yes he did. A very firm stance. I pulled myself in a different sitting position to hide my own firm stance.

----

Boys my age get hard for no reason all the time. I can tell you how many times I woke up all stiff in the morning. Getting hard from watching someone train had nothing to do with attraction. It was a sudden response due to puberty. That's all, really, that was all.

At least that's what I told myself until I had cooled down a bit.

When I was laying in bed at night quelling my adolescent lust for the act of procreation it was quite different than usual. Somehow I couldn't shake Rei's image from my mind. I was trying to think of beautiful big breasted woman with curves, but instead I saw Rei giving me that awesome smile of his and training in the sun. I changed my grip on my flesh and went with it anyhow, knowing that I'd feel really awkward the next morning when I would see him again.

And that was it. I was attracted to Rei. And I was okay with it. I could actually look him straight in the eye the next morning and ask him what was for breakfast. Everything was fine as long as I hid those feelings and stayed his friend. Because our friendship was important.

----

We were friends because we could talk to each other openly. We were also friends because we could sit next to each other and stay silent, doing our own thing for hours. Friends because we accepted each other's company, no fuss.

Although Rei really seemed like a ladies man, he was actually quite insecure around them. Sometimes when we sat inside my room, he talked about how he didn't get those girls. Did they really chase us 'cause we were cute, or famous, or were we really nice and awesome guys? To be honest I had no idea either. I thought Rei was cute, really nice and awesome, but saying that wouldn't be good idea now would it?

He also talked about Mariah a lot. She was a childhood friend of his and probably very important to Rei, since he talked about her in a certain way.

"Mariah and I went out last night, right?" He said as a spoke animatedly with hands. "Well I brought her to her hotel room, and she was clinging to my arm the whole time. She seemed sort of angry when I went back here again. But it seemed like a good evening. I thought I did and said all the right things. What the hell do women want?"

I chuckled and said: "Did you kiss her?" He seemed kind of taken aback by that question.

"Kiss her.. no.. should I have?"

-"Yes Kon, you go on a date with your girlfriend you kiss her goodnight. At least that's the way things go anyhow."

"She's not my girlfriend!" He almost yelled. "She a ... friend. Besides I've never kissed before. She'd be even more angry if I did try, and then mess up."

-"Never kissed? Sorry, I thought you two were together and all lovey dovey." Rei looked dejected. He turned his back towards me and started fiddling with a pillow on the sofa. I raised my BB magazine again and continued reading the articles on our possible next opponents.

"Have you ever?" I looked up at his back.

"Ever what?"

-"Kissed! Have you ever kissed?" I didn't know what to answer. I wish he'd turn around so I could see his face to see whether he was joking or not. It was silent for a couple of seconds. "What's it like?" Rei asked, softly.

"I don't know. I think kissing is something that is influenced by the people doing it. Let's say you kissed Mariah it would be different then when you kissed one of your fan girls." His shoulders went up a bit. He laughed a bit and turned around. I thought he was joking, but his facial expression was very serious. He scooted closer, his face was only inches away from mine.

"Show me what it's like."

That was a question that took me off guard. I had no idea what to do. He hovered in front of my face , still looking serious, as if the fate of the world was decided by my answer. I had no idea what my face looked like. Was I blushing? Probably, I felt my cheeks become hot. Was I smiling? Was I looking surprised? What was the best way to look in a situation like this? I mean, I wanted to kiss him, but I wanted to keep his friendship too. Then again, this request was made out of curiosity and ignorance. This might be the best situation possible to get kissed and not lose his friendship. But I had no way to utter these emotions. Instead I stayed silent. He read my silence as an okay and softly pushed on and pressed his lips on mine.

Ah bliss. I would have stayed like that forever if I could, but Rei pulled back all too soon.

"That's it?" He asked. "I expected a little bit more…" He made a movement with both his hands. "boom, or something."

-"Well," I said, finally being able to get my vocal cords to work again. "there's usually some tongue action involved."

"Oh! Really?" He plunged forward again and kissed me again, forcing me to open my lips. Fine, I thought, and kissed back. He was going to get the best kiss I could give as an example. I put both my hands to the side of his neck and played with his tongue for a bit, before pulling back a bit to change head positions. I slid my right hand fingers into his hair at the back and started massaging his scalp. I heard him breathing through his nose with uncontrolled breaths.

Hah, I thought when I had pulled back to give Rei space to breathe normally again. Just try that on your pink haired girlfriend.

He opened his eyes and smiled at me. "Thanks Kai!" And ran out of the room.

At night I jerked off on the memory of our kiss and groaned Rei's name when I came.

----

Some days later Rei announced he was going out Mariah that evening. He didn't say what he was going to do, just that he was going out with her. On the way to the door I told him 'Good Luck'. He looked back at me with a strange look on his face.

When he got home that night he went up to my room first, before going to sleep. I was in bed, reading my magazine, getting ready to sleep. He jumped on the bed with a grace that I'd become to find sexy and set himself down at the foot end.

"Still up?" He asked. I looked at the clock. 10.00, it wasn't that late. "We watched that new romance movie." He made a face that showed he didn't enjoy those kind of movies. "She liked it though." I nodded. "Then I brought her to her room." I put my magazine aside an decided to ask the question.

"Did you kiss her?" He gave me that look again that he gave me before he left for the date and gave me an answer that seemed somewhat bitter.

"Yes, Kai, I did. I kissed her. I kissed her like there was no tomorrow and left her gasping for air and more." I nodded again, though slightly taken aback from the reply.

"Good." Rei was my best friend. I was in love with him, but I also wanted him to be happy. Him finally kissing his girlfriend was good, right? I was jealous, but I knew Rei's happiness was important to me.

"I found something interesting about kissing when I was surfing online." He continued. "Apparently there's an erogenous zone in your mouth." He placed two fingers on his half parted lips, I put my magazine down on the covers, hoping it would help to cover my rising erection. I chuckled to avert his attention. He sat up on his knees and placed both his hands on his chest. "Not just the mouth, but men's nipples are sensitive too! Not like a woman's, but still…" He didn't need to tell me that. It's amazing what you learn from hotel pay-per-view channels. He had moved his hands from his chest down to his stomach. "And down here…" He looked down, his bangs hiding his eyes. "I read that some men preferred to be given a blowjob rather than have sex." Why did he only research male pleasures? Wasn't he supposed to look for a way to make his girlfriend feel good? This was uncharacteristically selfish of Rei.

He placed hands on the bedcovers and crawled my way like a cat, I still couldn't see his face. Don't get too close, I thought, pressing the magazine down harder. With a quickness that was not uncommon for Rei he snatched the magazine and pulled the covers off me. Before I could ask him why the hell he did that he pressed his hand on my crotch. I'm sure my eyes widened in shock. He softly started to massage the tip through my underwear. "You're a healthy boy, Kai, I'm sure you do 'that' to yourself. I read that when someone else does it, it's really amazing." He was saying, while I was trying really hard to get back to reality. A reality in which Rei had a lovely pink haired girlfriend and I was his best friend. "If," He looked up now, his face really close to mine. "If I jerk you off, would you do it to me too?" The reality of the situation finally hit me. I pushed him away harshly. My crotch suddenly cold without his hands warming it up. Rei fell on the floor and hid his face behind his arm.

"Don't do this to me Rei. I'm not the person to experiment these kind of things with. You should do that with your girlfriend." I was surprised at how I spat out the word 'girlfriend'. In turn Rei yelled "Mariah is not m…" He stopped, got up and ran out of the room. Not his girlfriend? Is that what he was going to say? But they kissed? Shouldn't that be a good start of a relationship?

It hit me. Like little pieces of a puzzle slowly coming together to show the bigger picture. Rei had been lying about Mariah. He had been testing me.

Rei 'liked' me.

---

I didn't quell my lusts that night. I couldn't, even though I was horny as hell, I just couldn't. My head was filled with memories of what happened only hours ago. Memories of our time spent together. Memories of when I first laid eyes on him. Memories of all the conversations we had. It was not until 4 in the morning that I fell asleep from pure exhaustion.

Nobody woke me the next morning fortunately. I probably would have busted some heads, if they had. When I finally got up and trudged downstairs I overheard a discussion between my team members.

"Shouldn't we wake him? It's time for training you know." This was Kenny.

"Just leave him be, if Rei says, not to wake him, why would we? Gets us a day off." Lazy Tyson off course. I stomped my way towards them, so they knew I was going their way.

"Morning Kai!" Max beamed my way, I ignored him. Coffee first.

I didn't train them or myself that day. Instead I sat outside in the grass all day, looking up at the clouds. A shadow sat himself beside me. I knew who it was, without even looking. I had become so familiar with the way Rei walked. The realisation didn't shock me anymore.

"Kai, I wanted to apologise. I drank some with Mariah and probably took a bit too much." I shrugged, he didn't smell like alcohol yesterday.

"Your lying." Rei jumped at my reply, then sighed.

"I guess. It's just really hard. I want to preserve our friendship, but… I messed that up right?" I looked at him, he seemed really pained. I wanted to say we could still be friends, but I couldn't. Things would be so different, now that I knew.

"Well, I might as well just say it, since things can't get any worse." He placed his hands on his chest the spread them out, forwards, like he was embracing the world. "I'm really sorry, but I'm in love with you." He turned his back to me again. "I'm sorry, I thought you liked me too. You were always watching me. And last week there was something in the way you helped me train which made me feel confident you did indeed like me. I was wrong in that assumption, I know that now that you've shown me. I hope your not too disgusted with me. I still want to be your friend… if you want to.

Did I show him I was disgusted? No I… just pushed him away. I wanted to be his friend. I wanted to talk to him, train with him, laugh with him. I… What did I want?

Rei stood up and left me alone with my thoughts.

---

After dinner I went straight up to my room to hide from everyone else.

Rei was really brave. I had always thought so. I admired that part of him when he went into combat. He was as fierce as Drigger. Rei had come up to me and apologised for his actions. What's more, he even told me his feeling in earnest. I hadn't even told him mine. I hid in my room and jerked off on visions of him in secret. I hated myself.

I should've at least told him my feelings as well. How I loved him, but how I valued his friendship more than that. How I felt literally saved when he came in and talked to me about daily things, but also personal things. I wanted that back. I wanted, no, needed his friendship. More than anything I needed his friendship. Because that helped me living this life.

I threw my BB magazine aside, got up from the sofa and headed towards Rei's room to give him an honest answer.

---

This was probably the first time I went to his room, since he always visited me. I got scared when I was about to open his door, but I shook myself awake and went ahead.

He was sitting on his sofa, staring ahead like he was in a trance. I coughed to gain his attention. He looked up at me with a dull look on his face. I closed my eyes and started the talk which I had just thought up.

"I was really surprised to find you loved me, I'm not disgusted. I was actually a bit happy, because I also feel like that. But I'm also a bit sad, because more than that I want your friendship." I opened my eyes for a couple of seconds. He looked at me with wide eyes. His beauty almost blinded me, so I closed my eyes again. "I don't want to lose you, because I love you so much. I can't be without you. I want to have your friendship." This was not what I had rehearsed in my room, but I continued anyway. "I need your friendship. I need you." My voice changed to a high pith all of a sudden. "I need you, so bad." I opened my eyes again. He was still sitting there, mouth agape, looking friggin' hot. "Oh, damn, fuck it." I rushed forward and placed my lips on his. I kissed him, not like last time, which was soft, sensual and sexy. I kissed him like there was no tomorrow; rough, wanton and passionate. And Rei kissed back, just as lustful. God, I wanted him.

---

Being jerked off by someone else feels indeed better than doing it yourself. But I'm quite sure that it can't feel as good as when it's done to you by the person you love.

And although I don't know about sex between a woman and a man I definitely love how Rei kisses me all the way down there.

"It's called fellatio." Rei said one time, after we had spent the whole evening exploring each others body, to eventually end up taking each others members into our mouths.

"I don't care what it's called, it feels good." I said lying on his bed, exhausted from pleasure. He grinned and played with my balls. It tickled.

"I want to have sex." He said, still grinning like a Cheshire cat. He snaked his fingers up to the tip of my penis. It twitched at the touch. I had no defence with this guy.

If I had decided that 'fellatio' from Rei was the best thing in the world, I took it back. Sex with Rei was even better. The way his hands, coated in cream, massaged my penis, his face looking extremely pleased with himself. The way he blushed and squirmed while he stretched himself. The way he groaned when he slid me inside himself. The way he moved his hips and the look he had when he was immersed in the act. The way he quivered when he came. I was mesmerised by it, mesmerised by him.

---

We had to be friends, before we were lovers. It was only natural to be afraid of losing that. I loved him and he loved me. That was even better than friendship, because in a romantic relationship you can be friends as well as lovers.

When I dared to ask him about Mariah he laughed really loud.

"Yeah she likes me, but I don't like her that way. She's the one who told me to tell you how I feel actually." I reminded myself to act more nicely to her than I had done in the past. Friends come in handy sometimes.

---

AN: Thank you for reading. Please review. Constructive criticism much appreciated.

-Ninsg Veen


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